2.

for the most part i have seen change come through my life like the turning of the tides – slow and steady rhythms taking me in new directions with a constant churn. ebb. flow. in. out. as predictable and even as breathing in sleep. 

but there have been a few crucial moments i can plot on a map. in a fraction of a second, in the span of a passing word – a look, a touch – and my whole life suddenly lifts up and away from its course, pivots abruptly and goes confidently in a new direction pulling me along in its wake.

last month i was given one of those moments. 

it came as a complete surprise, but then again, they always do. this one in the gift of a simple goodbye hug. in what initially began as a run-of-the-mill-goodnight, i was quietly relieved of over a decade's worth of negative self-talk. as the flesh behind my hips gently gave way beneath a gentle, confident hand, in its place, a grace i had yet to find on my own suddenly filled the void. for this one borrowed moment i was able to experience my body as another saw and felt it, and i could return to myself with the certainty that the soft yield of my skin behind my hips was just as it should be.